two toddlers, twice the fun

    So My little Bethany is not so much a baby anymore... she has her first tooth, she is walking, climbing, talking (hi), wrestling with her sister, helping put away toys during clean up, displaying her emotions... she is becoming her own little person so fast! Esther was over a year old when she started reaching most of these milestones.  It's so exciting to watch the two of them develop a relationship.  They clash at times, but for the most part they get along like two peas in a pod.  They jump on the couch together, read books together, terrorize the cat and dog together... It is keeping me busy that's for sure! But I still love every moment of it! Even in the frustrating moments... I take a deep breath and look at the positive; Yes Esther got out all my Stampin up stamps, but she was busy telling me what each of them were! And its annoying when Bethany finds the computer button and shuts it down, or even worse the power strip switch and turns all the electronics off, or yes its annoying that I can't play my guitar without Bethany trying to strum the strings, but she loves the music, and is learning to appreciate it early on.  Or the fact that as I was writing that last sentence, Bethany was climbing the stairs and I had to run to get the baby gate up... or as I was writing that she managed to get my guitar to fall on top of her and I had to rescue her... lol!
  Oh they keep you on your toes alright!  

Being a Happy Walker

    So I have continually been forcing myself to pack the girls and Jasmine up and go for a three mile walk, everyday that the weather is good.  Once I'm walking, I'm so happy that I got out; but the actual getting out the door is always a dreaded task.  The more regular I've gotten on my walks, for more people seem to recognize me. The other day a man on his bike said, "You're out again? keep it up!" Its amazing how encouraging and complete stranger can be! One of the most common comments I get while walking is, "my, you've got your hands full!".  My response to this has become, "Yes, and I'm loving every moment of it!".  I have to admit, there are times when I am not particularly fond of the 'moment'.  Like in the midst of Esther's numerous tantrums, or trying to feed Bethany her medication for her ear infection... But I know that it's only a matter of time that I will love those moments.  When they are just memories, and I can laugh about the crazy things Esther would throw a tantrum over, or how funny Bethany's faces were when she tasted the medication.  I will love every moment of it, and I will keep saying it to remind myself.
    I have a goal to smile, wave, say hi... something to every person I walk by.  Who knows, maybe I can change someones life.  So many people I walk by, have such little hope.  many of them are homeless.  They look at their feet with an emptiness, and a sag in their shoulders as if the world sat on them.  As I draw near, they glance up.  They catch a glimpse of my girls, and suddenly a smile sneaks across their faces. I light sparks in their eyes, they have for one moment, forgotten their pain and heartache.  For that moment, I will walk as often as I can.  Who would have imagined that something as small as a stroll in the park, would be used as such a ministry for God?

Here I Am

    I've been in such a strange place emotionally.  On one hand, I'm content to let God lead, and take my family wherever He leads.  Yet, I have this picture in my head of what God's plan should look like.  I'm terrified my mental picture is wrong, and I'm going to be disappointed.
     I believe God, please help my unbelief.  Let me fully and truly give myself and my family over to you.  Search me and know my heart, try me and know my anxieties.  See if there be any sinful way in me.  Here I am Lord; Please use us for your plan.

Just Around the River Bend

Last Sunday, Mark and I, took the girls on a walk along the Susquehanna River.  It was gorgeous! the trees had blossoms and leaves, and the flowers were boldly showing their delicate faces.  The buildings along the river are from the 1800's, full of character and romance.  The sun shone bright and warm, it was truly a simple joy to be outside.
    I hope to start taking the girls there more often.  The River is about a mile drive from our house, so I hope to take the girls and start walking.  I am starting to find happiness here in Harrisburg. Being happy in where we are now, and stop always looking to the next step in life.  I love how God's creation brings happiness. Where simple sunshine and the smell of flowers, brings you to a state of mind that just breaths contentment and childlike whimsy 

Deciding on Happiness

     Have you ever had the rug pulled out from under you? or maybe missed the last step on a flight of stairs? that feeling inside is so specific.  Yesterday I had that happen to me, not physically, but mentally.  

     It's been a long road to where me and Mark are now.  It has taking many leaps of faith, and tons of stress.  And just when it seemed God was giving Mark his dream job, and putting us in a perfect environment for me and the girls... well lets just say it feels like a door just got slammed in our faces.  

     It is so hard to recover as you watch a dream float away from reach.  You just have to take a deep breath and plow forward. And that is what I want to talk about.  choosing to be happy.  Happiness is not something you can buy; and even when you find it, that doesn't mean it will stay around.   Happiness is a choice, a daily decision to be content with what you have and to be happy with what is giving to you.  That being said, it is a DAILY DECISION! It will always be a battle, a daily choice to have the right state of mind.  There are going to be days when it is going to be harder than others.  Like when you were up most of the night with a restless baby, or when you wake up with a headache... oh the list goes on.  But I am finding happiness comes a lot easier; when you have a childlike faith, and trust that God knows what He is doing with everything that is happening in my family's life.  So instead of getting angry, or arguing with God.  I'm going to make the decision, for today at least, to lean on God and trust him.  And to be happy for everything He has already blessed me and my family with! 

Roasted Veggie and Sausage Stew

     It's been a bit since I last posted.  I can't seem to find enough time to think, let alone write down and post.  The terrible twos are here, and my seven month old just figured out how to crawl.  I'm one busy mama!
     So I came up with my own recipe! completely made it up! I'm so proud of myself.  So I had never roasted vegetables before, so I decided to be adventurist!

ROASTING
*set your oven on broil.
* cut cauliflower into small florets, and chunks. toss them with some olive oil and lay them on a pan with tinfoil.
* Rub down three or four tomatoes with olive oil and place them on a pan, as well as some peppers of your choice (I like to use one orange pepper and one poblano pepper).
* take some whole garlic, cut off the end and place on tinfoil.  Drizzle with Olive oil and crinkle the tinfoil up so the garlic is not exposed.
*throw the pans in the oven for 35-45 minutes, turning the peppers half way through (the peppers should turn black)
* when removing the peppers, place them immediately into a sealed container or zip lock bag to steam for ten minutes.  After ten minutes, peel off the black skin.

ROASTED VEGGIE AND SAUSAGE STEW
*Throw roasted veggies and a sprig of fresh thyme, into a blender and blend to desired texture, throw into a soup pan.
*brown some sausage in a large skillet, after browned, add a onion and fresh mushrooms.
*After the onion and mushrooms are soft and sausage is nice and browned, add an ounce or two of red wine simmer until the wine is almost gone, then add to the soup pan along with two to four cups of chicken stock.
*salt and pepper to taste, and let simmer for 20 minutes and serve!

So This is the Terrible Twos Huh?

     So today I was feeding the girls lunch.  Esther had a PB&J, a cheese stick, and a big green smoothie.  Bethany was having green beans for the first time.  Bethany was visibly loving every bite, which meant Esther needed to try some. However, after trying the green beans, she was unimpressed.  So she got down and picked out a different jar of baby food and handed it to me.  Calmly I said, "that's ok, we already have a jar, and you can share that one with Bethany." To which erupted a huge and loud tantrum... Welcome to the terrible twos Kristy...
      It's hilarious and at the same time rage inducing to parent these tantrums.  From the fake falls for cuddles, to the world ending screams for raisins; it's tough to know how to best proceed.  I guess I'll take it tantrum by tantrum, and love as much as I can.  Man it's tough being the adult all the time! lol